Table of Contents
PRAYER
Our goal today is to grow in relationship and learn how to walk with one another in all God has called us to be and do. Let’s begin by praying for each other.
Does anyone have prayer requests or stories of how God has been moving in your life that we can celebrate together?
THE SECOND CHANCES TOPICS
PAUL IN THE MESSY-MIDDLE :: ONESIMUS RETURNS CHANGED
THIS WEEK
We’re in a series from the book of Epistle to Philemon called Second Chances: A Path to Making What’s Broken Beautifully Whole, Again. Over the next few weeks, we’ll discover how the gospel works through real relationships—bringing reconciliation, restoration, and transformation where brokenness once defined the story.
Last week, we watched Paul stand in the gap as a mediator. This week, we follow Onesimus—the runaway. And in his story, we encounter a simple but powerful truth: The gospel forgives us, transforms us, and sends us back to the very places we once broke—so our worst chapter is not our last.
To help us start our time together, consider these questions (CHOOSE ONE, and don’t feel obliged to use any or all of them):
When you hear the phrase “second chances,” what comes to mind—a personal experience, a relationship, or a moment when you had to start over?
Why do you think it’s often harder to return and face something broken than it is to simply move on from it?
How have you seen God change someone’s life in a way that could encourage others in their faith or spiritual journey to return to Him?
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
SCRIPTURE
Have someone read Philemon 1:8-20 aloud. As you listen, notice any words or phrases that stand out, and ask the Holy Spirit to highlight something for you.
Philemon 1:8-20
Paul's Plea for Onesimus
8 Accordingly, though I am bold enough in Christ to command you to do what is required, 9 yet for love's sake I prefer to appeal to you—I, Paul, an old man and now a prisoner also for Christ Jesus— 10 I appeal to you for my child, Onesimus,[b] whose father I became in my imprisonment. 11 (Formerly he was useless to you, but now he is indeed useful to you and to me.) 12 I am sending him back to you, sending my very heart. 13 I would have been glad to keep him with me, in order that he might serve me on your behalf during my imprisonment for the gospel, 14 but I preferred to do nothing without your consent in order that your goodness might not be by compulsion but of your own accord. 15 For this perhaps is why he was parted from you for a while, that you might have him back forever, 16 no longer as a bondservant[c] but more than a bondservant, as a beloved brother—especially to me, but how much more to you, both in the flesh and in the Lord.
17 So if you consider me your partner, receive him as you would receive me. 18 If he has wronged you at all, or owes you anything, charge that to my account. 19 I, Paul, write this with my own hand: I will repay it—to say nothing of your owing me even your own self. 20 Yes, brother, I want some benefit from you in the Lord. Refresh my heart in Christ.
The Gospel Forgives Us
Onesimus’ story begins with failure—for whatever the reason unknown to us, he had run away and likely carried guilt, fear, and uncertainty about his future. Yet while away, he encounters Paul, who shares the gospel, and Onesimus experiences the grace of Jesus Christ, which meets him before wholeness is realized through a second chance.. Forgiveness becomes the foundation of his second chance, not the result of it. Similarly to Onesimus’ encounter, the gospel reminds us that God cancels our spiritual debt first, empowering us to stop running, living in the shards of brokenness, and to return to the fullness of wholeness that our lives long for and can only be found in Him through grace.
Leader Note:
Forgiveness is the starting point of not only spiritual formation, but healthy spiritual growth.
Grace received personally becomes grace shared missionally.
How does personally receiving God’s forgiveness help you speak more naturally about the gospel with others?
Who in your life needs to hear that their past does not disqualify them from belonging to and following Jesus?
What spiritual disciplines help you continually live from forgiveness instead of guilt?
The Gospel Transforms Us
In his letter to Philemon, Paul highlights the meaning of Onesimus’ name. It means “useful,” yet he says Onesimus was once useless and is now truly useful in the gospel. That contrast is the point. The gospel did not just adjust his behavior. It gave him a new identity.
Once marked by failure and broken trust, he is now called a beloved brother. That is a new birth. Not self-improvement, but inward renewal. He did not become useful by trying harder, but by belonging to Christ and being shaped through discipleship.
The gospel replaces shame with purpose. When identity changes, direction follows. Discipleship is learning to live from who we already are in Christ.
Leader Note:
Transformation is a process of perfecting rather than an achievement of perfection.
Personal stories of gospel change are powerful bridges for evangelism.
How could your personal transformation story help someone take a step toward faith in Jesus?
What is one area where God is currently shaping your character?
Who are you intentionally walking with—or who is walking with you—in healthy spiritual formation and growth?
The Gospel Sends Us Back Restored
After his transformation, Onesimus is sent back to Philemon, not as the same man, but as someone changed by the gospel. That return took courage, because following Jesus often means facing what we once ran from. Repentance has a way of leading us back to places marked by failure, discomfort, or even rejection. The gospel reconciles us to God and, whenever possible, moves us toward restoration with others.
Therefore, this kind of return is not about earning grace. It is about living from it, walking in the freedom and identity Christ has already given. Helping others mend what is broken is part of discipleship. In Onesimus’ return, reconciliation becomes visible. It shows the church and the watching world that second chances are real, costly, and beautiful.
How can reconciliation in our relationships become a visible witness to the gospel?
Is there someone God may be calling you to help take a “return step” in their faith journey?
What fears keep people from returning, and how can we walk with them through that process?
CLOSING THOUGHT
The story of Onesimus shows us the full movement of the gospel in action. God forgives us, meeting us in our failure and canceling the debt we could never repay. God transforms us, reshaping our identity so we are no longer defined by our past but by who we are in Christ. And God sends us back differently, giving us the courage and grace to return to the very places we once broke, not to earn favor, but to live out the freedom and purpose we have been given. Onesimus’ return was costly, vulnerable, and risky—but it became a living testimony of God’s restorative power. In the same way, when we allow the gospel to forgive, transform, and send us back, our lives become a witness to others—an invitation for them to see that no failure is final, no past too broken, and no person beyond the reach of God’s grace. This is the beauty of the gospel: it doesn’t just change us privately; it restores relationships, heals communities, and opens the door for new chapters to begin.
Lord Jesus, thank You that Your grace meets us in our failure, forgives our past, and transforms our hearts. Give us the courage to return to the places we have broken, to restore what needs reconciliation, and to live from the freedom You have given us. Help us reflect Your love in our relationships and guide others toward the same life-changing gospel. In Your name, Amen.
Joice has served as a missionary for nearly 14 years, including time in campus ministry with Victory Church (Every Nation Philippines), where she held various leadership roles. She later moved to Fort Worth, Texas, to help plant Mosaic Church Fort Worth. She holds a Master’s degree in Evangelism and Leadership from Wheaton College Graduate School. Passionate about guiding men and women to know God, grow in faith, and discover their identity in Christ, she walks alongside others through discipleship.
